The milky bar kid said it best… “The milky bars are on me!”, did he not? Has anyone received a free milky bar direct from the milky bar kid? No, ads lie. I think we all know that, but we hope that what they’re saying is true because they often tell us what we want to hear.

You know in a lot of skin care ads they claim that this product has been clinically tested? Which clinic? A vet clinic? A clinic for mentally deranged? Be specific people! But, we want it to be true. We want this to be THE product that works miracles on our skin, but they lie, they lie.

Ooooo and have you heard that you can calculate how in love you are by texting your names to a certain number! Crock! How dumb are people? We were working things out like that in high school, only we used a formula of letters and numbers. You can do it for free and you’ll still get the same crappy result!

Geesh! Oh and did you hear that “You’re worth it?”. As if you didn’t already know. Apparently we all deserve perfect skin and coloured hair.

And after consuming some of Allen’s lollies, I didn’t get giant toys roaming the streets spewing out free Allen’s lollies. They raise those expectations and then when no oversized, walking doll comes down your street, you’re left sugarless and alone. Sad!

A friend of mine was devastated to find out that there is no coke bottle that you can jump out of into a sparkling blue ocean. Lies, lies, lies. Disappointment that leaves a foul taste in one’s mouth.

For all my cynicism and complaining, I should come clean! I think I love ads! I love catalogue days (Tuesday and Wednesday). I dream of new things, beautiful clothes and the perfect skin product. But I know deep down they are all lies, I just enjoy the dream!

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