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The philosophy of our age is you can do whatever you want as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone. On the surface this statement looks fairly sensible. It looks like freedom of speech, of action. But can you have true freedom with no (or little) boundaries?

‘As long as it doesn’t hurt anyone’ is a subjective boundary. You can put it where you like and justify almost anything, as long as it feels right to you. But what if my behaviour doesn’t feel right to someone else? What if I am hurting someone and they are so politically correct, so polite that they can’t say anything? And this philosophy doesn’t apply to everyone.

Take the swear word ‘God’ or ‘Jesus’ for instance. If you’re a Christian and someone swears with these words, it can be highly offensive but most people continue to say it regardless. And who are we to say who is going to be hurt and who isn’t? It’s subjective and we don’t know everything.

Our individualistic society is a little blind. We’ve lost a beautiful sense of community and compassion. I know the past was far from perfect but I kinda miss manners and lovely words and the respect that all brought. People were unafraid to show that they cared. They would bring meals, make phone calls, write letters and were careful (in public at least) with what they said. Or perhaps I’m remembering some kind of ‘Anne of Green Gables’ type of reality that never really existed.

To be frank, I really don’t think many of us stop to consider whether we are hurting people. We’re kind of desensitised to that kind of compassion because we’re individuals now and we have rights. The individual always trumps the group/community. It’s a stubborn, narrow view of the world in my opinion.

We are not islands. We have been made to live in community. It’s a beautiful thing. So perhaps the new philosophy should be ‘Do what is beneficial not just to you but to your community – speak life into those around you, be generous, be considerate and don’t be afraid to love.’ It’s a little long-winded, I know, but you get the gist!

What philosophy do you think the world needs to adopt?


Image by Tom Murphy VII

Being a blogger is like talking to yourself and hoping someone else overhears and joins in the conversation. It’s a bit strange actually, but I love it!

I imagine the internet like a web (ha ha) of people floating with laptops secured to their… um… lap. They probably have a coffee in hand, some have glasses perched on the end of their noses and a vague, cloudy look in their eyes.

They have perfected the monitor stare, the google frown that comes from searching but not finding exactly what is needed cos there’s way too much out there. I’m hoping there is a wry smile on their face when they stumble on to my site. Not because I’m full of myself and think I’m amusing, but because I hope they find something useful, something to bring a little light to their day.

Blogging connections can be quite encouraging and friendly but we all know there’s another element out there. Whether they be just random spam or pointedly horrible, the ‘haters’ intrude on the peacefulness of a site with their sticky daggers and dark eyes. They’re unwelcome, slashing words are like acid to one’s soul and so, with a click of a key stroke I wipe them out of my site. Take that, haters! Fierce.

For the most part, blogging is a pleasure. It is nice and light and warm and fun! Recently I was in another city and happened to run into one of my readers who I didn’t know at all so it was extra special! (She was a cousin of a friend so not totally unrelated but …still!). It’s great to know that out there, on the ‘web’ you have invisible friends; people who appreciate and ‘get’ your thoughts and ideas.

So, if you haven’t given it a go, perhaps 2012 will be your blogging year! Let me know if you start and I’d love to read your thoughts and become one of your ‘invisible’ friends!

Once again, Merry Christmas! 2 sleeps to go. Woot!

Each day I make sure I have a heaped spoonful of guilt with my coffee.

As a parent it all starts when the baby is conceived. Did you eat the right food? Drink alcohol? Lie on your back? Take your vitamins? Exercise? Tisk tisk. Hello guilt!

Then the bub is born and the heaping rate increases: breastfeeding, bottle feeding, controlled crying, solids, crawling, talking walking, discipline, activities, socialising, reading books, taking walks, patting animals, tantrums, toys, parties and television. No wonder the modern parent walks with a stoop! Too much pressure, guilt and expectations straining the back muscles. Plus we have to work our butts off to pay for all this!

All this stuff makes us very nervous parents. We get advice from grandparents, strangers in supermarkets (“Oh she must be tired”), well-meaning health professionals, peers, childless friends and teachers. And guess what? They don’t always match up! It would do a parent good to sit in a dark room with a head torch and write out what kind of parent they want to be and decide just to do that. Blinkers on, eyes straight, off you go!

Guilt comes from the fear of making mistakes or the mistakes themselves. It comes from dirty looks from others and unsupportive comments from well-meaning family. The bottom line is that as parents, we have the right to make mistakes with our kids. It must be OUR mistakes. And as long as we’re not abusing our kids or doing something illegal, all the rest of society must wait until we ask for help or advice, not shove it down our throats, heaping on more and more guilt and stripping away our confidence.

I have spoken to so many mothers lately who are struggling with unsupportive people around them. These are close friends/family who mean well, who want to help but are making things much worse for the poor mumma. They have forgotten what it means to be in demand 24/7, to be responsible for a growing life, all while trying to maintain one’s sanity and self-esteem. It is a tough gig and the pay is terrible!

Parents carry enough guilt around on their own. We don’t need to be told we’re no perfect parents cos we pretty much know that already. We will thrive, however, with little notes or words of encouragement. Then, watch us become better parents and watch us come to you for advice when we need it!

Rant over for another day!

Comments? Reactions?


Vote now for Worddancer in the Best Australian Blogs competition. Simply go to

And then scroll down to the green section and use this URL
Thanks a Mill!!!!

Today I bought a domain name. It is an exciting step on the road to blog-business success. (I hope!). I like the fact that there are writers out there who had no idea what they were doing when they first started but are cracking it now!

So, I do declare that anything is possible with my small, measly technical skills but hip happening passion for the written word. Oh and the exciting thing about the net is that you already have an audience, you just have to find it.

I would love to do business blogs, communicating with customers regularly, perhaps with a hint of fun, a little bit of humour? So this is the beginning of my blog/net/newsletter/copy writing business. It may succeed, it may fail, but people, if we don’t “fly by the seat of our pants” our pants may stick to the seat. Hmmm that’s a stretch.

Anyway, let us crack the champagne bottle on the bow of this boat called and see how she sails. (I laugh at my poor attempt at the poetic).

Haul the anchor, set the sails and float damn you, float into the sunrise over kind and tranquil waves to adventures in far off lands, to snow, desert islands and peoples of all languages, cultures and toileting habits.